I have two little boys. One named Ethan who’s 4, and one named Eli who just turned one. I actually have two babies on the way and we just found out that we’re having a boy and a girl. My little boys are with my sister because whenever I gave birth to Eli on June 21st of 2018, I had been using opioids.

I started out with taking pain medicines out of my parent’s medicine cabinets. I had a drug problem that was developing. I went and had a conversation with my dad who was going to help me get into a rehab program, and about a week after I had told him about my issues, he was hit by a drunk driver. He was my best friend and it was like I had no will to live. I wasn’t trying to kill myself, but I had just lost the will to live. There’s a program called Safe Babies Court who referred me to Susannah’s House. Since I’ve been here, I am 105 days clean today. They have prenatal class that just the pregnant moms break off on our own and we focus on relapse prevention skill that are unique to being pregnant. Because once they deliver, that’s a trigger. The babies that are growing inside me, they weigh 1 pound and 6 ounces a piece right now, are growing on a perfect schedule because I have been clean. Without Susannah’s house, that probably wouldn’t be happening.

My personal goal is that by Christmas we all four will be back together, but I have learned that if it doesn’t happen in my time or in God’s time which isn’t the same as my time, that as long as I keep doing the right thing and reaching out when I need help that it will happen.

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